The CT scan and the gym

so after a huge palaver with a bed on a ward, no bed on a ward, witnessing a terse bed related stand off between nursing staff from different units I go back to the assessment unit and await a bed, and a CT. I'm promised my CT at 9pm. Eventually I'm told I have a bed, but not in the ward we were expecting. I was popped in my wheelchair again and off we trundled to my new bed. On the way up Vicky my fab nurse says " I don't really want to tell you where we're going.......... You're in the gym"
"Shut up!" I say ( in my defence I am a born and bred Bristolian) but no- there is a temporary ward set up in the physio rehab gym, 3 beds for 3 poor lost souls with no bed on a ward. So I get in bed with a view of the running machine, rowing machine and rehab walking bars. More about this later
At about 10.30 I get called down for my CT scan. I get dropped in the waiting room by the porter and left. It is a small waiting room, and it contains me in my wheelchair, a very dapper chap in his braces shirt and slacks in an ambulance trolley, another ahem less dapper chap on a hospital trolley and a little old guy in his dressing gown in a wheelchair like me. A bored looking nurse and 2 paramedics complete our party.
We sit in silence, occasionally catching each other's eyes and quickly looking back at the floor, the wall, our cuticles- ANYWHERE than in the eyes of another ill person. Suddenly there is a loud noise from the corner- dressing gown man lets out the loudest burp ever. We all, including him pretend it hasn't happened. Then trolley man starts calling for his nurse and she quickly erects a screen around his trolley ( please remember this waiting area is very small) it soon transpires quite quickly that he has had a bit of an accident and soiled his trolley. "Ribbit" says dressing gown man as he expels another huge belch. Oh bless trolley poo man but oh my days the small confined room, too many people and oh dear. We'll leave that there but it was unpleasant.
Soiled man goes in for scan, and is replaced by broken leg moaning man. Clearly he is in a lot of pain, he has a plaster cast on his lower leg which has been cut half off but he is in very vocal pain. Poo man comes out of scan, I go in. CT scans are weird. I'd already had to drink a jug of contrast stuff to light up my innards but when I got in the scanner they then gave me iv contract to light up the rest of me. So I am like a walking inside out Blackpool illuminations come ready brek kid hybrid. Now the iv contrast. How weird is that?! It feels warm and travels down your body warming as it goes. Luckily they warm you that when it hits your pubis area it feels like you are weeing yourself. Warm, spreading, and out of your control. Luckily CT is very quick and efficient so I was quickly scanned and popped back out into the waiting room where we are greeted with a loud low welcoming belch, and the sight of broken leg man in the foetal position on the floor having managed to fall or climb out of his chair. I am glad to leave the ct guys cajoling him back into his chair and I get pushed back to my gym home by the porter.